No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
