There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
