i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Randomize
