I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
