Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
How's work?
Spinning.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize