3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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