Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
