you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
