weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
