Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
