Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
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