wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
