I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
