Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Randomize
