My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
