office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
