just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
