me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
