can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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