i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
