I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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