did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
