For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
In other news, I just burned my penis
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
