Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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