So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
