How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Randomize
