i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
