so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
