i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
