that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
last night I used snow as a chaser
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