He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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