Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
