talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize