That's intense
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I bet he comes in French.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize