i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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