Where are you?
In a non slutty way
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
