yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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