official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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