Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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