Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Randomize