Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
