If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
