if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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