is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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