Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Randomize
