y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
