he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
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