Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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