A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Edward fifth and chaser hands
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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