Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
