I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Randomize